Welcome.

My name is Victoria Rose Gray.

I'm a writer, sketcher, painter, and lover of french fries. I work remotely, I prefer mountains to beaches, and I have no pets. I live with my partner, who is my best friend and favorite person. I do a lot of therapy and I've realized that most of how I work things out is through journaling, storytelling, and picture-making.

If you'd like to join me on my journey of dealing with life, good, bad, and the opposite of indifferent, please do. If you're not interested in often uncomfortably self-aware writing and general navel-gazing, please go with grace and enjoy your life.

To all of you who choose to stay and witness, I say again: welcome. I hope we can enjoy the walk together until our paths diverge.

To see what offerings I'm really excited about right now, keep reading!

Quietus: Remember & Prophesy

An offering that incorporates self study through journaling, being reflected by a compassionate witness, and visual and written storytelling to help you see your ideal self in your current self.

"Our aim is to get free [Quietus] from our current perceptions of our bodies by reintegrating ourselves [remembering], focusing on what we both already believe and want to believe [prophesying], and acting as if it has already come to pass. By quieting the voices that are no longer serving us, we can craft a new narrative that better supports our current reality and our future vision."

EXCERPT FROM THE QUIETUS GUIDE

This offering includes:

Your Quietus Guide: a digital booklet to keep record of your thoughts and our meetings, as well as the itinerary for the rest of the process.
One-on-one video chat sessions with me to discuss your answers in the Quietus Guide and the direction of your portrait.
One completed digital portrait of you as your ideal self, as you are now.
A set of affirmations (a new story) to help you in your continuing work of remembering and prophesying.

Testimonials from Quietus Participants

Victoria Rose Gray is not a licensed therapist or medical doctor. Participation in Quietus cannot be construed as any type of mental health counseling. psychotherapy, or medical advice.

Frequently Asked Questions

What should I expect while doing Quietus?

The practicalities: You should expect to schedule an initial meeting with me via video chat through my scheduling service (click the "Start Quietus" button above). You'll pay then. After that, you'll get emailed a copy of the Guide with next step information in it. You'll do some journaling, discuss it with me, get a portrait brief (a description of the digital portrait) to approve, send me reference images after I tell you what I need, and finally, you'll receive your portrait and your new stories. We'll have one final video chat to discuss the portrait and stories. Since this is a beta offering, I'll also be asking for specific kinds of feedback along the way.

The less tangible stuff: You should expect some stretchiness and discomfort. Depending on how much of "the work" you've done either alone or in therapy, you may be surprised by how much you've already thought about these things, so the level of stretchiness may vary. Some of my questions in our meetings may feel a bit mystical/loosey goosey, in an attempt to get at "the vibe" of how things feel to you, but there shouldn't be anything unintelligible.

The TL;DR: You'll journal around how you see yourself and how you want to see yourself, you'll talk to me about it, and at the end you'll get a portrait and set of stories to help you see yourself that way as your are now.

I'm not sure this is for me, but I'm really interested. How can I be sure?

I believe that only you can be sure what's good for you AND I believe we can hash out enough of what excites you and unsettles you so that you can make that decision as informed as possible. Just shoot any questions I haven't answered elsewhere in the FAQs to me using the Contact Form below.

This process can feel a bit woo woo and may stretch some mental and emotional muscles you haven't used much, and I do try to stay away from industry jargon and explain what I mean as we go along.

Who is this program for?

Anyone who feels like they can't quite unlock the deep soul believing of new truths they've mentally accepted. You already know your conditioning is telling you lies about your worth, but you don't quite believe it deep in your bones yet.

Anyone who is ready to dive into deep self-examination and unravel the stories behind their perceptions. There isn't just objective reality: there is always some sort of meaning making we are assigning. Figuring out what that meaning or story is helps us decide what story we'd rather work with instead.

Anyone who has the resources and support system to handle any uncomfortable memories, sensations, or emotions this process may arouse. This could be as simple as some good chocolate and a hot bath or may be as involved as a therapist on speed dial. Regardless: if you know that activation is a possibility, you have a way of handling whatever shamey, blamey voices may pop up without self harm.

Anyone who feels a mixture of excitement and desire in addition to any concern, dread, or anxiety. If this program appeals to you at all, that means there's something here for you. Email me with your questions!

Who is this program NOT for?

Anyone who is deeply activated or triggered by looking at or discussing their own body. This is not a bad thing. It is an acknowledgement and acceptance of your current reality. You are setting boundaries around your own mental health and not taking damage in the name of "self help."

Anyone who isn't ready to take a look into their past. Again, just because something "should" be healthy doesn't mean it actually is for you. And if it ever becomes a step you want to and are ready to take, you can come back here.

Anyone who does not have the resources (be they time, money, or emotional energy) to do roughly five hours of work around this topic. Approximately three hours of journaling and a couple of video calls to discuss to your answers may not sound like much, but if you're maxed out, you're maxed out.

This feels pricey - I'm not sure how to justify the expense.

I'm not here to tell you it's not a lot of money: you know your budget and your limits.

So what I can tell you is what you're paying for:

A custom, digital portrait - this is not about vanity: it's about seeing yourself for who you are and who you want to be.
15+ hours of my time: This is our video calls and my behind-the-scenes work.
A curated, digital guidebook and a live guide (me!)
At least two video calls with me, where you get to feel seen and understood - be weird! Be simple! Be uncomfortable!
Being a priority: when you invest in something like this, it means that you think you're worth the time, effort, and emotional energy.

I get that this feels like a luxury buy and maybe for you, it will be. But being a luxury does NOT mean this is frivolous or foolish: cultivating a more loving, shame free way of being is not going to be a waste of your time or resources.

Also: the payment plan option exists to make this easier to swallow over time.

How far out should I schedule our first meeting?

There are three sections of journaling prompts that must be completed prior to our first meeting. Each section should take roughly an hour for a total of three hours. At this point, people have done the whole thing in one sitting in one afternoon OR taken a few months to sift through the material, so it really is up to you. On my part, I typically need 1-2 business days to review your answers once you send them to me.

What happens during the video chats?

The boring version: We will talk through the answers you submitted on your Guide.

Potentially more to the question: I do my best to put you at ease. I will be asking a lot of questions and I am a good listener. You get to be as silly or serious as you like, and I will do the same.

Things Allowed on the Call:

Pajamas or casual clothing
Swearing
Eating (you just need to be able to chat)
Ugly honesty, ugly laughs, ugly tears

Things Not Allowed on the Call:

Verbal or emotional abuse toward yourself or me
Bigotry (there's a difference between consciously struggling with societal conditioning and actively supporting, living, and breathing it)

What are my refund options?

Since this is a custom, digital offering, full refunds are not possible. If you are unhappy with the process any time up to approving the portrait brief and wish to cancel the process, your funds will be credited towards a commission of your choice at my standard rates.

After the brief has been approved, the portrait will be considered "started." If you wish to cancel the process at this point or later and do not want the current portrait, I will prorate my time at my current rate. Any surplus over my current rate structure will be applied as credit towards a commission of your choice at my standard rates.

If for any reason you are unhappy with your completed portrait and we cannot fix the issue after three edits, you will still receive the digital portrait and completed Guide as promised and no credit will be applied to further commissions. If you still wish to have me work on the portrait further to get it to where you want it, any further edits will be subject to my standard commission rates and rules. While I want you to be happy with the end product and I value the investment you have made, I cannot offer compensation when the services have already been rendered to the best of my ability.

If you are on the payment plan, you are still required to make all payments, even if you choose to cancel the process. The same rights and pro-rated structure for applying your paid funds to another type of digital commission apply at each stage of the process.

If you're interested in enrolling in Quietus, please send me a message in the Contact Form below. I'll reach out to you to let you know as soon as I start a new intake.

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